Good Grief? What’s so good about grief? Why you grieve is certainly not good, but we all grieve and we all do it differently. I am here to tell you that there is a good and bad way to grieve. The bad way is to ignore what you are feeling or try to pretend it’s all good. For me I thought that if I could just stay busy it would be able to bypass grief. I was so wrong! I learned over time that allowing myself to grieve and actually leaning into it was good (as good as good gets under the circumstances)! Not allowing yourself to grieve only delays the inevitable. I was there.
I spent a year digging into to anything but me after I lost my mom. I did not want to feel the pain, I thought I could avoid it. Nope! I just delayed the process by a year and the result was a me that was not me. I was irritable, isolating, angry, and snippy. Until I grieved. My delayed grief was still grief and going through it the right way was GOOD. I am still grieving my father who transitioned four months ago but when you know better you do better and this is good grief, at least for me.
I had a little help along the way learning how to experience good grief. Grief Share is a national Christian based organization that has groups all over the country designed to help individuals who have lost a loved one experience “good” grief. It is faith based so it uses scripture to help those who grieve understand God’s sovereignty. I learned how to normalize grief, understand the journey, and most importantly confront the feelings that were getting in the way of my quality of life.
Whether it is Grief Share or counseling, or your faith walk, or a journal, or talking to a good friend or other, find your way to experience Good Grief. There is a time and season for everything, and I pray that if you are stuck, or unable to move forward, don’t stay there. Life is too short for all of us.